As is my penchant ... I'm wanting to blog on a book I'm currently devouring: "Get Your Power Back: Find and Remove the Underlying Conditions That Destroy Love and Sabotage Your Life" by Bill Ferguson ... founder of "Mastery of Life". He's been featured on Oprah, and recommended by The Wall Street Journal.
His simple, practical, and powerful tools for life-transformation are impacting my life ... and in order to dig it in deeper-yet, I'm going to blog through this book ... for me, but perchance for someone else as well. Yeah, true selfishness always pays off (go read my previous Osho blogs for insight into that one!).
Let's start with an excerpt from his introduction:
If you have a relationship or any other area of life that isn't working, there will always be an underlying condition of resisting or hanging on that is creating the problem.
This condition creates a state of fear, upset and tunnel vision. It takes away your power and destroys your ability to see clearly. It keeps you from finding solutions and forces you to act in a way that makes your situation worse.
In relationships, this condition destroys the experience of love and creates conflict. Individuals get hurt and put up their walls of protection. They fight, resist, hang on and withdraw. Instead of creating a relationship that is loving and supportive, they create one that is full of suffering.
Until this underlying condition is found and removed, you will be forced to act in the same way, which will produce the same result. Fortunately, the process of finding and removing this underlying condition is relatively easy. You just need to know how. Learn more about this condition.
It is possible to have love in every relationship and in every area of life. You do this by growing in your awareness and healing inside. The next step is to learn some powerful tools and take specific action.
The first part of this book shows how we create our lives, particularly the areas of life that don't work. Once you discover why your life is the way that it is, you become more able to determine how your life will be.
The second part of the book is about finding and actually removing the specific underlying conditions that sabotage your life. AS you do this, the problem areas of your life begin to clear up.
Instead of creating a life of fear and upset, you create a life of love and opportunity. You restore the happiness and freedom you once had. You become far more effective and much more able to have your dreams come true.
I've heard it said in SO many venues, "what we resist, persists." And it's just so very true. It's counter-intuitive, counter-reactionary. When we dislike an aspect of our life, a condition we're facing, our knee-jerk reaction is to pull away, back off, *resist* ... but in doing so, we actually create more of the same that we're resisting ...
Which ... brings on the fear that causes "tunnel vision" ... and in that state, fear is all we can see. We feel paralyzed, confused, unable to think clearly, unable to see the myriad of choices we actually have.
The real problem is that we have core issues ... false beliefs that FEEL "true" to us ... unquestioned assumptions and beliefs that we swallowed whole during our "pre-critical" early childhood state ... usually prior to the age of 6 or 7. IOW: "conditioning." The very inner-explanations that enabled a small child to navigate life, are the self-limiting restrictions that cause us to sabotage our own life and relationships, as an adult.
This is like a whole 'nother way of learning to relate -- to ourselves, and to others.
Come with me on this journey ... into the final frontier of our very Core. We have nothing to lose but limitations ... and EVERYthing to gain..!
Shalom & Namaste~
Dena
5 comments:
I would only say, Dena, that nothing can destroy love, but many things can affect its expression in a particular situation, and even when it's expressed well it still has to be received.
It's them 'core issues' that's the biggie, for sure:)
very cool! i've come to this awareness, too. you can check out my current "a ha" here http://theshitzizle.blogspot.com/2011/01/not-settling-for-winter.html and here http://theshitzizle.blogspot.com/2011/01/man-challenge-aka-dad-challenge.html
I agree with you, Harry ... I believe Bill F. would say that there are things that would destroy the *experience* of love ... IOW, we can FEEL a lack of love ... even though love is always there.
It's just that it's very possible for love to be temporarily blocked ... by judgment, by anger, by fear, by numbness, etc.
My favorite analogy is that the sun is always shining ... it can just *appear* to be blocked by the clouds ... and the clouds will move on.
Lenette -- thank you for your blog link ... you enabled me to discover a new singer ... and some great songs!
Dena, whatever your 'clouds' are, may love's irresistible, persistent warmth dissolve them; and may the truth of who you are flourish in the sun:)
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