Oh Death ~ Where is Your Sting ~ Part I

So, the other day, maybe it was just yesterday, I spent some time on the phone with Michele O'Donnell (she who wrote the books about "living beyond disease" that I've been foisting on y'all). She shared some things that were challenging to what I think I know.

I found myself in a quandary ... kinda-sorta part way between one mindset that's falling away, and another mindset that's emerging from behind the veil of the former ... and I feel myself pulled in two directions (or so it seems) ... and so I told God this was happening (yeah - like He needed to be informed! He was just waiting for me to confess it as my experience, so I'd be willing to deal with it).

The feeling was of confusion, and percolating fear (fear of losing something I currently cling to) ... and yet an excitement that a lie was about to be revealed, and thus Truth was about to emerge, and thus that freedom was about to be had...!

Basically I told God that I really want to see this thing the way He does, so, please do what it takes to make that happen.

And then I went about my business ... doing what I'd been given to do. Y'know, living life.

Well, this morning, it seems that God met me (again, in the bathroom - Our fave hang-out, me and God), and a downloading has been going on since ... for a while there, I couldn't keep up with the note-taking ... ("could You please slow down a bit, God? My hand is cramping!") ... and it continued during my walk ... wishing I'd had a recording device ... hoping I wouldn't lose it as the endorphins settled down again ...

It really started yesterday, after the phone call, shortly after uttering that "help!" to God ... a friend shared this (thanks, Annie!):

There's a deep rut in the "Christian faith", as most believers experience it. It's like a ditch that you run your car into and can't get out of. Unless God tows a believer out of the rut, he or she will never fully live out of their union with Christ.

The rut is this: most of us believe that in the depths of our being we are both good and bad. Or, to put it in theological terms, we are both righteous and sinful. Using a common illustration, we believe that we have within us both a white dog and a black dog, a good nature and a bad nature, that are fighting for control.

But that is not true. It is vital that we know it's not true, because if we believe that we are both righteous and sinful, it will be impossible to live out of our union with Christ and to rest, trusting that He lives through us moment by moment. Instead, we will be focused on ourselves, on getting our act together, on winning the war that supposedly rages within us, trying to suppress the bad part of us so that the good part will reflect the character of Christ. This endless self-effort is the complete opposite of what Paul wrote:

I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God... (Galatians 2:20)

The only way out of this dilemma, of believing that we are both good and bad, is to understand that the realm of the spirit, above the line, is singular. It is one. The realm of appearances, below the line, is a duality. It is two.

In the realm of appearances, there is constant evidence of good and evil, both outside and inside us. If we judge by appearances, we arrive at the logical conclusion that we are both good and bad. That looks entirely valid. Christians have believed this for centuries. Except for a small minority who have come to know their true identity in Christ, the whole Christian world accepts the lie. Unfortunately, although something may not be true above the line, if below the line we think it is true, it still controls us. We must choose to live out of what is singular, rather than what is dual.

The realm of the spirit, the singular realm, is eternal reality. That is where our spirit being lives, and where our true identity is settled forever. The realm of appearance, although we must live in it in the here and now, is false as far as our identity goes. All of life depends on which realm is ultimate reality to you: the realm of spirit or the realm of appearances. That's going to determine what you believe and how you live.

Choosing to believe that you are not both good and evil can be difficult. All of the external proof, all of the apparent evidence, all of the sight, supports the opposite: that you have two natures. ''You are good, yes, a little good, but boy, you are still wicked; you are still evil.'' Only the Holy Spirit can reveal to you that you only have one nature, not two. In the core of your being you are not both righteous and sinful; you are only righteous.

Now bear with me, as this unfolds ... this is being birthed in me, and I'm hoping to be able to relay it as it happens ...

Then, this morning, I read about eternal Life ... not as Christianity has defined it (i.e., something we achieve via faith, after we die), but as the very Life of God -- which we are living, here and now.

- Immortality is not longevity ... immortality is the realization of our true identity as God-breathed beings ... manifestations of God Himself... here and now. And this life does not end. It cannot.

- Death is not a part of God's creation ... for "the last enemy that shall be overcome is death." Yes, of course, each of us will, in our own time and way, pass from sight to beyond-sight. But we are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses ... ultimate reality is that which we cannot see, yet.

- Those who do not live in knowledge of God (who He is, who we are IN Him), may be "forced" out of their bodies by disease, accident, or old age; those with an understanding of God as HE is, as we ARE, make the transition without struggle, pain, or infirmity. We all leave this plane of consciousness ... but how we leave is determined by our understanding of God.

- Life is a long series of transitions ... we go from utero, to infancy, to childhood, to adolescence, to maturity, to advanced years ... each state of consciousness gives way to the next. Those who accept the transition of each stage to the next, without trying to cling to the previous state (which is then outgrown), do not experience the "infirmities" of aging. Resisting the advancement of years, as if they are to be feared, actually brings about many of the sufferings/manifestations we associate with age...! (it's not what happens to me that harms me -- it's what I *think* about what happens to me that harms me) When I accept the natural changes that come with each transition-stage, I'm able to look forward to each new experience ... receiving them with joy and confidence, rather than with fear and dread. My perception determines my experience.

- I am here for a purpose ... to do that which was prepared for me to do from the foundation of the world. To cooperate with God in bringing Light into darkness. As long as I still have work to do, in this plane of existence/consciousness, God will maintain me in strength, youth, vitality, health and wholeness. And when it's time to transition, I transition.

- Every transition is for the glory of God, and for my own development and growth. Each is good, each is necessary. None are to be despised, discounted, or resisted.

- (Here's a biggie!) Death is never part of any of these experiences. What we call death is just another transition, to follow those preceding it. Death is our human interpretation of what we are witnessing. But what did Jesus say, prior to resurrecting those who were called "dead". He said, "they're only sleeping." I notice that I go to sleep every night ... and I notice that I wake up to life again. What is this telling me... day after day, after day...?

- Once we know God, once we know who He is, His true nature and character (and not what man declares), we realize that we are living His life and this life is eternal ... flowing without end. "He is your life, and the length of your days."

- I notice that our bodies "die" daily ... fingernails and hair is dead material that is cut off, and continues to grow ... skin sheds, cells continuously change, being renewed ... the body I am in is not the body I was in even a few years ago ...! It is continuously "dying" ... and yet my true identity, my consciousness *remains*. What does that tell me?

- Here's the problem: from birth, we are told and trained, and unquestioningly believe, the notion that our bodies are US. We have identified our bodies as ourselves ... when, in truth, our bodies are instruments for us to use in this stage of life... the earthly/physical plane. It's a vehicle ... never for one minute do I confuse myself with the car that I drive ... my car is not ME. It's an instrument to get me around. SO too, is my body. My true self is spirit, Spirit, consciousness of God. And this, my true self, never dies ... whereas my body is always dying (John Lennon once said, "we don't die - we just change cars").

- I see that I'm told that I need to die daily ... that is, my thought of me being my body, my mind, needs to die daily, so that the real me, the Spirit, can emerge and live. I am here to live the Life of God.

- Transformation takes place in consciousness/awareness ... and then is externalized as form. Thoughts become things. Everything first begins as a thought. As a man thinks in his own heart, so is he.

Next, I'll share the thoughts that began to come to me, as I meditated on what I'd read ...

Shalom, Dena

Dying to Live ...

Are you living? I mean REALLY living? Is your life Abundant? Are you dying to live? You can really live you know ... and the way to get there IS by dying.

There are SO very many clues in scripture that the Kingdom is a topsy-turvy experience...! First is last, last is first, serve to lead, weakness is strength, those who self-exalt fall, humility lifts up, down is up, and in dying we live...!

What we cling to we lose ... what we let go of we gain.

And we're all, in various ways, dying to live ... to really live, to abundantly live. What if we're going about it backwards? What if the traditions of man (those collectively-egoic teachings) nullify the word (urgings/promptings/whisperings) of God?

During Jesus' ministry years, two men came to see Him, and here was Jesus' answer to them:

24 Most assuredly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain. 25 He who loves his life will lose it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.

Jesus talks in parables ... He teaches us how to see the unseeable, do the undoable, and know the unknowable.

Here's what I'm getting out of that passage:

"Be willing to let go of your present/current understanding of life, of God, of yourself. Let go of the egoic desire to preserve your own status quo life ... be willing to live in such a way that fulfills the purpose for which you have been created: to display the Life of God - the Abundant Life. Be willing to let go of what you think you know, no matter how compelling it may seem to be, appear to be, and let the Author of Life define Life to you ... die to the old ways of thinking, so that the new can emerge and LIVE."

This is not about behaving into a new way of being ... religion does that -- it seeks to control behavior, through shame, through fear, through group-think pressure, as if that actually changes someone on the inside (look at history, and see for yourself whether that actually *works*). This is about changing an awareness, a consciousness, a way of seeing, believing and thinking, that cannot HELP but manifest in a way of behaving.

God doesn't want better-behaving people ... God wants a people who sees with His eyes, thinks with His Mind, and responds out of His heart.

And the way we get there is by dying to what we think we already know.

Let's look at how this message is being announced to us, loud and clear, through nature. We can see a clear pattern, if we look at it ... every day, the night covers the land, and we are plunged into darkness ... flowers fold up, birds cease to sing, all life seems to suspend ... fears increase, crime flourishes, nightmares ensue, shadows are turned into menacing appearances, by our imaginations. Even pain and disease seems to take on a more intense presence, in the dark. And YET - without fail, Light appears each morning ... and night recedes without a bit of resistance or struggle ... it's absorbed by the Light, effortlessly.

Every fall and winter, life seems to cease, as the world goes to sleep ... plants stop production, nothing grows, birds fly away, and animals go into a deep coma ... the entire land seems to go dormant. Days grow short, nights increase, the climate turns violent and harsh. And YET - without fail, Spring appears after winter, days increase, Light floods, life bursts forth from its slumber, without a resistance or struggle. Winter gives way to the power of growth.

Caterpillars appear to die, even being "buried" within the cocoon, and the insect turns to "goo" while it's in there ... but it is reformed within, and emerges as new life.

And so it is with the seed ... the seed falls from the plant, to the ground, encased in a hard protective shell that keeps out light ... that protection has to fall away, to die, and the seed appears to die, to go dormant, to be hidden in the ground, seemingly dead, for a time.

But there is a Life Force within that seed that cannot be denied, and from within, it breaks free from its enslavement, and emerges up, led always up, toward the Light, toward breaking free from all that would keep it down, toward its Source. It does not rest until it appears.

That seed had to let go of what it previously knew (the mother plant), to plunge into the unknown, to fall to the ground ... if it had remained on the plant, it would have whithered uselessly ...

That which appears to be dead, that which falls to the ground, gives way to new life ...!

Do you see...?

Let's look at some scriptural examples of this principle:

- Abraham took years to come to the end of his own attempts to fulfill God's promise of a son ... it wasn't until he quit struggling that the new life came.

- Moses spent four decades in the wilderness (dark thinking) before he received his revelation in the burning bush -- truth from God -- that transformed his life, and gave him purpose.

- David lived in isolation, letting go of what the world defines as success, learning that in God is his power and strength and wisdom.

- Jesus lived for 30 "normal" years, until he was able to say, "by my own self I can do nothing - I do as I hear, as I see the Father doing."

- Paul spent 3 years in isolation after his blinding conversion, letting go of what he'd been taught, having his mind renewed.

There is no "Book of Dena" (though it seems I'm attempting to write one, LOL!), but in my own life, I spent 21 years trying all that medicine and religion told me to do, in order to overcome bulimia ... but when I finally gave up (exhausted!), God met me where I was, changed my perspective with truth, and set me free.

Now, it's interesting to me that when Jesus raised folks from the dead, He told everyone that the dead were "sleeping" (as the night sleeps? as the winter sleeps? as the animals hibernate? as the butterfly and the seed sleep?)...! And it's interesting that Elisha *saw* (spiritually saw) Elijah being taken away "by a chariot" ... it seems to me that we have much to question about what we call death ... if the nature of life is God's life, which is eternal, then what we call death isn't really death -- it's not the end -- it's a transition from one form of life to another (just like the seed doesn't really die, it is transformed).

If we cling to what we think we know, we forfeit the Abundant Life ... if we die to what we think we know, we live the Abundant Life ... for it emerges out of what has died. Out of what appears to be death -- life always comes forth!

Death where is your sting?

There must be a death to our old way of thinking/seeing/believing/behaving, so that real life, God's life manifested in ALL that is, can emerge to our awareness. His life is in and all around us ... but we have to have eyes to see. Our old ways prevent us from seeing.

22`The lamp of the body is the eye [the perspective], if, therefore, thine eye may be perfect, all thy body shall be enlightened,

23but if thine eye [perspective] may be evil, all thy body shall be dark; if, therefore, the light that [is] in thee is darkness -- the darkness, how great!

24`None is able to serve two lords, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will hold to the one, and despise the other; ye are not able to serve God and Mammon.

(Mammon is defined as the "god of this world" ... or our own egos, and the collective ego of mankind.)

If we see through the evil-perceiving lens of the ego, we will experience evil (including dis-ease, disease). If we see through the lens of Light (God is Light, and in Him is no darkness at all), then we experience all that comes with Light: wholeness, harmony, abundance, goodness, peace, joy, love ...

We have a choice.

We need to die to those thoughts/teachings that tell us that God sees us as a failure, as someone who needs suffering and punishment to "fix" us ... if we cling to those, we are the seed clinging to the tree, whithering away. We can take the plunge, fall to the ground and "die" ... so that real Life can emerge and grow.

God is asking us to look, REALLY look at our lives ... at the consequences we're experiencing, at the fruits we're displaying (fear? love?), to take stock of how we're living.

God asks, "Do you WANT this, which you have chosen by your beliefs?"

If the answer is "no," then God says,

"Then choose again."

And THIS is what repentance really means: to choose again.
Shalom, Dena

God Comes to Me Disguised as My Life ~ Welcoming the Unlikely Messengers

So how are we to respond, when we see something we dislike, and strongly react to, within another person...? How do we know what's them, what's us, and what how we are to respond?

I notice that we tend to project our own stuff "out there", because it's easier to see it when we detach from it. What we're blind to in ourselves, we see OH-SO-CLEARLY in another ... and if we know how to use this awareness, we'll see it for the profound *gift* that it is...!

Projecting is ignoring the log in our own eye, and hyper-focusing on the speck we see in the eye of the other. We only SEE the speck because we *possess* the log ... and yet the nature of the log is to blind us to seeing what it is that's blinding us.

Jesus was clear about what we were to do first -- tend to the log. The speck, in all reality, is none of our business. There's three kinds of businesses: my business, your business, and God's business. The only one of the three I'm to tend to is my business. Knowing what's what is a matter of maturity .. too often, when we are filled with "facts" and not the experience of wisdom, when we have an overabundance of self-promoting certaintude and zealous energy (typically found in our youth), that energy can be skewedly put into the trouncing of others. Of course, the tendency is to be blind to this when we're smack-dab in it ... and so we tend to be insufferable for a while, until we outgrow it. We can't see it until we have the wisdom of hindsight ... we have to get out of it before we can see it. God knows this, and we can know this too, and can thus love the one who's temporarily afflicted with it. To varying and diverse degrees, we all "know not what we are doing." We are all the bumbling-beloved of God -- and if we got a clue about how OK this all is with Him, and is even likely a source of hilarity for Him, we might just ease up on each other as well, and enjoy the journey ... free to encourage each other, rather than climbing that tree of the knowledge of good and evil, and lobbing rotten fruit at each other ...!

I can't prove any of this to anyone... this level of awareness transcends "facts" (which are not as reliable as we've been led to believe, but again, we won't know that 'til we see it for ourselves). This comes from experience, and it takes time and long hard lessons learned the tough way ... though some, of course, manage to stubbornly hang on to their own skewed perspective to the very end ... and while it may seem like a "waste" from our limited perspective, they serve as examples/lessons/reminders to the rest of us for how *not* to think/believe/behave -- nothing is wasted in God's economy.

While reading "Practicing the Presence" this morning ... I was struck by what Joel Goldsmith wrote about seeing God in all others ... it requires some focused intentionality, particularly when the ego is loudly broadcasting, drowning out the God-glimpse within them.

He spoke of how those of us who see, who are walking the narrow path (the road less traveled), are called to see and to call forth the God-consciousness in the other ... which is a sort of "dying to self"... my ego-self wants to engage with their ego-self, to compete and to hopefully win ... and thus I'm meeting the problem with the same consciousness wherein the problem arises -- in the realm of the ego. When I do this, I merely exacerbate the problem ...

It is HARD, very much like a "dying" to choose to see the good, the God-essence, in the depth of the other ... hard to see past that which "hooks" me, and "triggers" my old unresolved stuff (pain not yet attended to, losses not yet grieved, assumptions not yet challenged) -- leading me to *react* from my ego rather than to *respond* from my spirit.

Dang, dang, dang, this is HARD...! But mostly, I believe, because of the unresolved things within me that *CAN* be hooked, and thus draw me in to the ego-scuffle. I believe, because I've experienced it in some areas of my soul, that when I attend to the inner-things (when I deal with the "log in my own eye"), then I am free from the "hook" ... then I cannot (in THAT area) be "triggered" again by the externals (whether in the form of a person, or a situation), and I AM then free to respond from my spirit -- from who I really am. (Note the subtle but powerful distinction between "reacting" and "responding"...!)

Then, I notice, I am able to deal with the splinter in the eye of the other, or else realize that it's no big deal, and not my business.

Perhaps the awareness of the splinter in the eye of the other is merely meant to show ME the log in my own ... and THAT is my business, THAT is my work -- the rest is only God showing up as messengers/angels in the people and circumstances of my life ... God comes to me disguised as my life ... my question for myself is: will I reject how God shows up, or will I embrace whatever form He chooses...?

While I can't say I have a "requirement" for how others must believe, I notice that if they are not open to accepting others who have different views, if they believe that everyone "should" believe a certain way, then relationship (of any meaningful measure) cannot thrive ... without mutual respect, mutual sharing, mutual hearing and receiving and acceptance, there is no ground for true relationship.

Words about how they "love" me, and thus must correct/reject me (because I believe differently) are empty and hollow to me ... I don't "feel the love" when others have to withdraw out of self-protection. What they love is their own concept, and the projection of what they think I "should" believe, how they think I "should" behave. They love their concept of me, which is in their own mind, rather than really loving me (who is in continual transformation ... and is that not the point to life?).

Of course, the "me" they reject is also a fabrication of their own mind ... they tell themselves a story about me, and they believe the story, and they aren't connecting with the real me ... aren't trying to hear me, to understand me, to accept me. Perhaps this stems from not really knowing the real them ... perhaps they don't know themselves as God knows them (and who else can truly define us, but the One who made us?). Perhaps they cannot yet love their neighbor as themself, because they do not yet love themself, because they don't yet know how God loves & accepts them...? (and perhaps this is just as true for me)

I also notice that if they withdraw from me, and do not share themselves with me, do not allow me to hear them, then I don't really know them either ... then I only have the story I tell myself about them.

But the glory is in how I have a CHOICE in the story I tell myself about them. I can choose to see them as "wrong" and thus judge them, and end up doing/being the way I'm judging them to do/be (judgment always does that, I notice).

I can choose, instead, to tell myself that who they really are is a child of God ... one of the bumbling-beloved, doing the best they can based on where they are in their own journey with them ... I can forgive what they do (they know not what they are doing), I can look past their projection-of-self to see the real Self ... I can intentionally look for God-in-them, and focus on that, letting the rest go as temporary ego-fluff. I can love my neighbor as myself, when I realize that we're all manifesting the same Self (a huge shift in awareness that makes all the difference ... I'm only beginning to taste the edges of this awareness, and I want more ... I expect to receive more).

I can receive them as divine messengers ... if I see something I do not like in them, I can be sure that I can only see it because I also possess it (something I never like to admit to, initially, LOL!). When I can allow myself to see that, to own that, to accept that, then I can receive that message as a gift -- if I resist it, then I miss the message, and miss the gift. My choice. But I can always learn.

I acknowledge that I resist and miss most of the messages that God is lavishly and generously offering me, because I (or my ego) do not like the packaging ... and so I "cut off my nose to spite my face" ... and for the time being, I remain "stuck" in my own warped perspective ... but such is the human experience, such is the purpose of life, to learn from who & what we encounter ... and I see that I can either learn the hard way, or the easy way ... thus far, my penchant, it seems, is to learn the hard way ...! Ah, the humanity!

But I believe in transformation, and I believe it's happening, and I believe that I'm learning ... albeit ever-so-slowly (according to my perspective, anyway) ... perhaps I need to treat myself with the same patience and graciousness that I sense the Spirit is inviting me to extend to others ... rather than demanding that I strive according to my own ego, I can instead allow myself to respond to the Spirit who is, indeed and always, leading me into all truth.

Maybe I can really trust that ... maybe it's really true.

Wow ... I needed to hear this!

Shalom, Dena