Can We Talk? We've Got a Problem Here ...!

The soul is the perceiver and the revealer of truth.

We know truth when we see it, let skeptic and scoffer say what they choose. Foolish people ask you, when you have spoken what they do not wish to hear, "How do you know it is truth, and not an error of your own?" We kow truth when we see it, from opinion, as we know when we are awake that we are awake.

We distinguish the announcements of the soul, its manifestations of its own nature, by the term Revelation. These are always attended by the emotion of the sublime. for this communication is an influx of the Divine mind into our mind. It is an ebb of the individual rivulet before the flowing surges of the sea of life.

(Ralph Waldo Emerson, from his essays)


So, can we talk? Have you noticed that we've got a problem here? I'm talking a global, worldwide, humanity-planet problem. Hunger, wars, recession, earthquakes, famines, abuse, widespread psychological struggles, diseases, rage, suppression, misogyny, scape-goatting ... I mean, surely you're noticed.

Now, I'm not making a case for despair here -- despair is what got us *into* this mess, y'know. I'm no longer a pessimist (I was for about 4 decades, and it's just no longer working for me anymore) ... I enjoy life to the fullest I can, and I expect it to continue to get better and gooder (I enjoy making up my own words, too!).

Nope, I'm not advocating for despair -- but for being aware, and for repair.

We need to face where we are, and how we got here ... we need to look squarely in the eyes of whatever has caused us so much despair that we would seek to destroy ourselves.

Obviously, we humans have tried long and hard to fix what's wrong ... and we've tried to solve our problems at *every* level except the level at which the problem(s) exist(s): Our Beliefs.

Our notions about spirituality are destroying us.

We humans have sub-divided along lines of group-think, and we have doctrinalized, dogmatized, and divinized our beliefs, and we have demonized those who dare to believe differently.

This is spiritual arrogance. And it's caused more pain and suffering than any other aspect of life. We've suffered personally over what we believe, and we've caused others to suffer, due to what we believe. Our ideas about God have caused suffering...! We've twisted the Source of our greatest joy into a tool of our greatest pain!

It seems that we humans will give up everything for our beliefs ... we will give up love, peace, health, harmony, happiness, safety security and sanity...

But the one thing we seem to not be able to give up is this: Being RIGHT.

We've proven that we will sacrifice everything we've achieved, everything we've desired, everything we've created, in order to be "RIGHT".

In fact, we'll even give up life itself ... in order to be "right".

And we're terrified of being wrong.

What if it's not about right or wrong..? What if it's about what works, and what doesn't work?

And what if, while we need to question our beliefs, we don't need to *destroy* them? What if, instead of destroying them, we need to transcend them. Transcending means "larger than" more than "other than". The new usually contains some of the old ... it's even sometimes built on the old. We needn't reject all that we've believed ... but we certainly need to see it from a new, higher, deeper perspective, in order to find out what's really true -- experientially, revelationally.

(And no -- contrary to ecclesiastical opinion, those are not multi-syllable curse words.)

The really cool thing, is that we don't have to declare (to ourselves, or to others) that we were *wrong* at all... we just didn't have a complete understanding before (& really, completion/perfection comes incrementally). We needed more information, more experience, more revelation. I mean, a wise 6 year old doesn't think he was *wrong* to have been 5. The point is growth ... and to not resist the inevitable change that comes with growth.

Next - I want to look at some of the goofy things our beliefs have told us ...

Shalom, Dena

Dying to Live ...

Are you living? I mean REALLY living? Is your life Abundant? Are you dying to live? You can really live you know ... and the way to get there IS by dying.

There are SO very many clues in scripture that the Kingdom is a topsy-turvy experience...! First is last, last is first, serve to lead, weakness is strength, those who self-exalt fall, humility lifts up, down is up, and in dying we live...!

What we cling to we lose ... what we let go of we gain.

And we're all, in various ways, dying to live ... to really live, to abundantly live. What if we're going about it backwards? What if the traditions of man (those collectively-egoic teachings) nullify the word (urgings/promptings/whisperings) of God?

During Jesus' ministry years, two men came to see Him, and here was Jesus' answer to them:

24 Most assuredly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain. 25 He who loves his life will lose it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.

Jesus talks in parables ... He teaches us how to see the unseeable, do the undoable, and know the unknowable.

Here's what I'm getting out of that passage:

"Be willing to let go of your present/current understanding of life, of God, of yourself. Let go of the egoic desire to preserve your own status quo life ... be willing to live in such a way that fulfills the purpose for which you have been created: to display the Life of God - the Abundant Life. Be willing to let go of what you think you know, no matter how compelling it may seem to be, appear to be, and let the Author of Life define Life to you ... die to the old ways of thinking, so that the new can emerge and LIVE."

This is not about behaving into a new way of being ... religion does that -- it seeks to control behavior, through shame, through fear, through group-think pressure, as if that actually changes someone on the inside (look at history, and see for yourself whether that actually *works*). This is about changing an awareness, a consciousness, a way of seeing, believing and thinking, that cannot HELP but manifest in a way of behaving.

God doesn't want better-behaving people ... God wants a people who sees with His eyes, thinks with His Mind, and responds out of His heart.

And the way we get there is by dying to what we think we already know.

Let's look at how this message is being announced to us, loud and clear, through nature. We can see a clear pattern, if we look at it ... every day, the night covers the land, and we are plunged into darkness ... flowers fold up, birds cease to sing, all life seems to suspend ... fears increase, crime flourishes, nightmares ensue, shadows are turned into menacing appearances, by our imaginations. Even pain and disease seems to take on a more intense presence, in the dark. And YET - without fail, Light appears each morning ... and night recedes without a bit of resistance or struggle ... it's absorbed by the Light, effortlessly.

Every fall and winter, life seems to cease, as the world goes to sleep ... plants stop production, nothing grows, birds fly away, and animals go into a deep coma ... the entire land seems to go dormant. Days grow short, nights increase, the climate turns violent and harsh. And YET - without fail, Spring appears after winter, days increase, Light floods, life bursts forth from its slumber, without a resistance or struggle. Winter gives way to the power of growth.

Caterpillars appear to die, even being "buried" within the cocoon, and the insect turns to "goo" while it's in there ... but it is reformed within, and emerges as new life.

And so it is with the seed ... the seed falls from the plant, to the ground, encased in a hard protective shell that keeps out light ... that protection has to fall away, to die, and the seed appears to die, to go dormant, to be hidden in the ground, seemingly dead, for a time.

But there is a Life Force within that seed that cannot be denied, and from within, it breaks free from its enslavement, and emerges up, led always up, toward the Light, toward breaking free from all that would keep it down, toward its Source. It does not rest until it appears.

That seed had to let go of what it previously knew (the mother plant), to plunge into the unknown, to fall to the ground ... if it had remained on the plant, it would have whithered uselessly ...

That which appears to be dead, that which falls to the ground, gives way to new life ...!

Do you see...?

Let's look at some scriptural examples of this principle:

- Abraham took years to come to the end of his own attempts to fulfill God's promise of a son ... it wasn't until he quit struggling that the new life came.

- Moses spent four decades in the wilderness (dark thinking) before he received his revelation in the burning bush -- truth from God -- that transformed his life, and gave him purpose.

- David lived in isolation, letting go of what the world defines as success, learning that in God is his power and strength and wisdom.

- Jesus lived for 30 "normal" years, until he was able to say, "by my own self I can do nothing - I do as I hear, as I see the Father doing."

- Paul spent 3 years in isolation after his blinding conversion, letting go of what he'd been taught, having his mind renewed.

There is no "Book of Dena" (though it seems I'm attempting to write one, LOL!), but in my own life, I spent 21 years trying all that medicine and religion told me to do, in order to overcome bulimia ... but when I finally gave up (exhausted!), God met me where I was, changed my perspective with truth, and set me free.

Now, it's interesting to me that when Jesus raised folks from the dead, He told everyone that the dead were "sleeping" (as the night sleeps? as the winter sleeps? as the animals hibernate? as the butterfly and the seed sleep?)...! And it's interesting that Elisha *saw* (spiritually saw) Elijah being taken away "by a chariot" ... it seems to me that we have much to question about what we call death ... if the nature of life is God's life, which is eternal, then what we call death isn't really death -- it's not the end -- it's a transition from one form of life to another (just like the seed doesn't really die, it is transformed).

If we cling to what we think we know, we forfeit the Abundant Life ... if we die to what we think we know, we live the Abundant Life ... for it emerges out of what has died. Out of what appears to be death -- life always comes forth!

Death where is your sting?

There must be a death to our old way of thinking/seeing/believing/behaving, so that real life, God's life manifested in ALL that is, can emerge to our awareness. His life is in and all around us ... but we have to have eyes to see. Our old ways prevent us from seeing.

22`The lamp of the body is the eye [the perspective], if, therefore, thine eye may be perfect, all thy body shall be enlightened,

23but if thine eye [perspective] may be evil, all thy body shall be dark; if, therefore, the light that [is] in thee is darkness -- the darkness, how great!

24`None is able to serve two lords, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will hold to the one, and despise the other; ye are not able to serve God and Mammon.

(Mammon is defined as the "god of this world" ... or our own egos, and the collective ego of mankind.)

If we see through the evil-perceiving lens of the ego, we will experience evil (including dis-ease, disease). If we see through the lens of Light (God is Light, and in Him is no darkness at all), then we experience all that comes with Light: wholeness, harmony, abundance, goodness, peace, joy, love ...

We have a choice.

We need to die to those thoughts/teachings that tell us that God sees us as a failure, as someone who needs suffering and punishment to "fix" us ... if we cling to those, we are the seed clinging to the tree, whithering away. We can take the plunge, fall to the ground and "die" ... so that real Life can emerge and grow.

God is asking us to look, REALLY look at our lives ... at the consequences we're experiencing, at the fruits we're displaying (fear? love?), to take stock of how we're living.

God asks, "Do you WANT this, which you have chosen by your beliefs?"

If the answer is "no," then God says,

"Then choose again."

And THIS is what repentance really means: to choose again.
Shalom, Dena

Musings on Duality...

Having had this conversation elsewhere, a few times actually, I thought I'd muse a bit on it here as well ...

So what IS duality?

Duality is the belief in a power of good, and a power of evil ... most
traditionally seen as the "battle" between God and the devil.

But the battle is all in our minds ...

It also breaks down into the insistence of seeing things as polar (& competing) opposites, i.e., black/white, up/down, hot/cold, right/wrong, in/out, included/excluded, painful/joyous, acceptable/unacceptable, brokenness/wholeness, me/you, heaven/earth, life/death, and so on ...

But what if, rather than being opposites (& thus in competition), what we really have is a display of a spectrum ... a continuum of the same thing, depending on our perspective when we see/experience it..?

What if we're meant to see these as two sides of the "same coin," and that both to be understood, appreciated, and even embraced, in order to enhance and bring meaning to the human experience...? For how do we learn what something is, until we've experienced what something is not?

Ponder these quotes for a moment:

“When you make the two one, and when you make the inner as the outer and the outer as the inner, and the above as the below, and when you make the male and female into a single one, then shall you enter the Kingdom.” Jesus in the Gospel of Thomas

“The human mind rarely sees beyond these opposites to the Greater Unity that necessitates them. But the mind can awaken to Greater Unity, and in this lies the purpose of Creation and of humankind.” Reb Yerachmiel ben Yisrael

“The creating intelligence must become what it creates if it is to fully express its own non-duality.” Laurence Freeman in Jesus, the Teacher Within

As I now see it, and as I find affirmed in scripture, there is One Power, and
that is God ... God is good, God is love. God is all in all. God created all
things, including humans with a penchant to "fall" (& I now believe that the
fall was necessary) ... and God called all that He had made "good", even "very
good" (& He never took it back).

And all things work together for my good -- no matter how I may perceive them and judge them at the time (for my perception is very, very limited and skewy). I notice that the way in which I perceive/judge a thing (or a person), is the determining factor in the way in which I then experience a thing (or a person)

Any other "power" is only in my mind ... and I can project that "power" out, and "see" it and experience it (and we see the effect of this in the world around us -- the collective belief in evil creates manifestations of evil.) As a man thinks in his own heart so IS he. Jesus says that evil comes out of our own hearts (or "unrenewed minds"). What comes INTO us doesn't affect us, but what comes OUT of us can defile us.

If we believe lies, the lies will seem like "truth" to us.

I see that the belief in duality (seeing more than one power), is to go against
the first commandment ... the Lord our God is ONE - beside Him there is no
other. In choosing to see a world filled with duality, we are creating the mental image (an "engraved" image in our minds - or, an idol, if you will). On that foundation will be built much (all!) shame, guilt, pain, suffering, and the very human vs. human mentality we see manifested in the world all around (and even within) us...!

If we believe a thing, then that thing will be "as truth" to us.

I see that we were told to stay away from the tree of the "knowledge of good and evil"... the level of self-deception that there is anything BUT God in operation "out there".

In looking a bit more closely at this, I notice that trees are often biblically symbolic of a "way of understanding," or a "mindset." We're told to eat from the tree of Life (God's Life, God's Perspective), not from this tree of Duality. I also see that the Hebrew word for "knowledge" can also be translated as "perspective" ... interesting. So, perhaps it could more clearly be said: "do not partake, or let into yourself, the mindset of the perspective that things can be defined as 'good' or 'evil'." IOW, while we are in human form, and subject to our carnal/egoic minds, we have no business, and indeed no *ability*, of correctly discerning what is "good" and what is "evil." Further, God declared ALL that He had made to be "very good." And what exists, anywhere, on any plane, which was not created by God...?

When I connect the dots, I see that the concept of duality is nothing more than an illusion in my own mind.

I have to settle the matter within me, and then I will observe the world around me differently ... I have to be willing to have my eyes opened, to have the veil lifted, so that I can see as God sees ... and I do believe that this is His will and desire for me, for you, for everyone. And I do experience that we can either cooperate with Him, or resist Him.

I believe I will come (& am coming) to see that everyone is doing the best they can, based on what they believe -- if they believe lies, if they believe they are evil, if they believe they are an enemy of God, then they will ACT that way.

I believe I will come (& am coming) to see that people are just confused ... they do not know Who is within them (what other Source of life do we imagine there IS?). I will come (& am coming) to see that the Kingdom of God/Heaven is within me, and once I see/experience it there, and everywhere, it transforms everything else I see.

Duality, is believing that there is anything BUT God.

I see that God is Omnipotent (all powerful -- no power but God), Omniscient
(all-knowing, no knowledge but God), and Omnipresent (there is nowhere in which God is not -- "where can I go from Your Presence ... if I go to Sheol, You are there").

AISI, we're *still* to stay out of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil ...
all too often, religion trains us to climb that tree, judge everything we see as
"good" or "evil" and then throw rotten fruit.

It all depends on what we deem to be the truer reality ... the world we see
around us, or the spiritual realm. This takes a shift in consciousness ... I've
come to see that I'm a spiritual being having a human experience.

(this is also backed up by discoveries in science, i.e., quantum physics)

Let's go back for a minute to those seeming "opposites" that we observe through the lens of duality ... if I change my thinking, and accept that they're sides of the same "coin", and that they show me a divine dichotomy, and if I allow them to be perceived as a WHOLE, something amazing happens:

- When right and wrong are united, I experience compassion.

- When love and hate are united, I experience forgiveness.

- When good and bad are united, I experience non-judgment.

- When male and female are united, I experience balance.

- When hope and despair are united, I experience trust.

- When Heaven and earth are united, I experience peace,and joy.

And when I see that, I can enjoy this world around me far MORE than when I used to fear it as "evil"...!

Shalom, Dena


P.S. I am aware that two areas in my life, which are in need of a "shift," are health/sickness and finances. God-incidentally, after putting out this desire, I received a book in the mail yesterday, that directly addresses a shift in the perspective of sickness/health ... I'm excited about it, and cannot wait to share it here!

(What) The Bible Tells Me So...

I started reading Richard Rohr's "Things Hidden: Scripture as Spirituality" this morning, and about ran out of ink, underlining the introduction ALONE...! [Richard Rohr is a Catholic priest ... a contemporary mystic, and a wonderful reSource I've recently discovered.]

I'm loving that he's making sense out of the Bible ... I've never had the the notion that I'm to discount the Scriptures (or Jesus, for that matter!) just because the traditions of man have nullified them. I see the Bible as a gift, and I want to appreciate the gift for what it IS -- not a rule-book, not a source of "how to form the correct conclusion," but a macrocosm of what's going on within mySELF (& humanity in general) ... my journey, writ large, through the collective consciousness of humanity, as it/they/we encounter God, seemingly without, and finally withIN...!

Just as we so-often take 3 steps forward (grasping a concept, glimpsing truth), and then 2 steps backward (doubting the concept, thinking the truth "too good to be true"), so TOO has humanity, through the ages! This reality is painstakingly revealed throughout Scripture - a live-action demonstration of the fallibility of man, and the patient-mercy of God.

We make a mistake when we read the scriptures literally/woodenly, thinking that the backward-motions are to be codified ... where they're really meant to be demonstrative, showing us how we do the same ... showing us that we too can move from darkness into Light, even if the path seems hopelessly circuitous and meandering ... even if we *imagine* ourselves to be "lost," "forsaken," "separated," or "condemned" along the way (always keeping in mind that as a man thinks in his heart, so is he).

Just as our own concepts of God are birthed in our immature/obscure perspective, and then emerge, slowly (& even painfully!) into maturity and clarity -- so TOO has it been with mankind as a whole. Just as we once saw our own parents' disciplines as harsh and unloving (& SO unfair!), only to later realize that they were motivated by love for us (unless we had parents who were confused & unconscious) ... so TOO has mankind evolved from seeing God as a harsh and wrathful demanding-volcano-God (who requires sacrifices), to seeing that God is 100% love, and 100% goodness ... the God who sacrifices even His own reputation for His beloved children ... allowing us to malign His nature and character, as all the while He woos us into all truth ... knowing well that we know *not* what we do (for He knows we are as He made us to be).

The Bible teaches me that stumbling is part of the process (how did we not get this, in watching our own children learning to walk?).

It teaches me that my choices (in not just what I *do* but in what I choose to *think*) are part of my transformation.

The Bible teaches me that God did not want sacrifice and appeasement, but mercy and intimacy.

The Bible teaches me that the letter of the law kills, but that the Spirit brings life.

The Bible teaches me that I'm to be an experiential-participant in my own life, and that God wants to have experiential encounters with me (rather than to have me living vicariously off of the historical encounters of others).

The Bible teaches me that I'm to have the approach of a curious child (a "beginner's mind"/humility), rather than a mind that assumes I've already arrived at "all truth" (pride/arrogance).

The Bible teaches me that I'm not a human being trying/striving to become spiritual, but that I'm a spiritual being, having a human experience (that we're all spiritual beings, whether we yet know it or not).

It teaches me that I'm not to be afraid, despite appearances that would seem to be fearful ("judge not by appearances").

It teaches me that I don't have to believe everything I think (HUGE "aha" for me!).

The Bible teaches me that God doesn't want my understanding of Him to be based on "what the Bible says," but on what I experience in the dynamic spirit/Spirit relationship within me!

It teaches me that change is integral to life ... that we are not static, but dynamic (shift happens)!

Best of all, the Bible teaches me that God is much different than religion has taught -- that He is better than we had feared -- that He's too good to NOT be true...!

God does not change -- but our ability to perceive and accept God as He is does indeed transition and enlarge over time. Both individually and collectively/historically. The Bible demonstrates this in graphic and living color. I have learned to not just read the "black" of the Bible (the ink-on-page), but to also read the "white" (the space in-between, where the Spirit both inspires and interprets).

How beautifully FREEING it is for me to finally realize that life is not meant to be a straight line, a pass/fail test, but that it's *meant* to be a process of getting-the-point, and then missing-the-point and then getting-it-anew-again ... of encountering God in various ways (through various means), and to learn who He is (and thus who we are) even while fighting Him, avoiding Him, running from Him. Catching glimpses of breath-takingly beautiful truth, only to dismiss it as "too good to be true - I must be making that up." God uses ALL of it. Out of all the infinite options God had at His disposal, in setting up this universe, THIS is the one He chose -- the very one we're experiencing. It is utterly laughable to imagine (in our arrogance!) that we have thwarted the plans and purpose of God...!

There is a grand purpose in this adventure of life ... discovering who we are *not* (through our harmful-or-helpful choices, and the resulting consequences) ... so that we can recognize (re-cognize, re-KNOW) who we really ARE...!

I love discovering that I can appropriate and appreciate the Scriptures (including Scriptures from other faith-traditions) for what they ARE, rather than for what the traditions of man told me they are ... NOT a rule-book, NOT a guide for forming the "correct" conclusions, but a panoply of an unfolding/dawning perspective ... moving out of murkiness into the brilliance of Light -- emerging out of a dim-glass perspective into the "too good to NOT be true" glory of all Truth..!

Yes -- it is true -- God comes to me disguised as my life.

May the grand adventure continue...!

Shalom, Dena

Thoughts for a Friend ...

A sweet young friend wrote to me recently, in much fear and pain, asking for prayer for a physical problem. Certainly I can relate to being catapulted into a tailspin of fear and anxiety ... it goes with a sense of helplessness and hopelessness ... when all we can see at the end of the tunnel is a faint light (& even then, the fearful assumption can be that it's a train coming right for us!).

And YET -- I've been learning that I've got a much more profound role to play in my own life ...

I see much of what passes for faith in God to be merely a sanctified sort of fatalism ... a resigned victim mentality ... as if God is fickle and capricious, but that since He's the only option we have, we may as well oy-vey ourselves into compliant acceptance.

What if that's a product of our own imaginings, and not the design of a loving and lavishly gracious God...? What if that concept arises from our own ego (both individual and collective) and not from the intersection of spirit-and-Spirit..?

What if God really *is* good, and all His plans are good, and that we're invited into not merely cooperating, but co-creating with the God in whose (Creative) image we are designed..?

With all that in mind, I'll share what I wrote to my friend:

My friend - you are created in God's image ... that means you have incredibly powerful creative abilities within you. Your mind is a powerful tool. When you think negative thoughts, you are, in effect, creating negative outcomes, bringing them about in your own experienced reality.

When you choose to focus on fear and illness, you empower them, and even bring them into manifestation.

When you choose to focus on trust and peace, you empower them, and even bring them into manifestation.

God gives you this choice, and this glorious responsibility.

You have nothing to fear but fear itself ... God is good, His universe is good -- ALL things work together for your good. No exception. No matter HOW things appear to be, we are to judge *not* by appearances (how they SEEM to us at the time).

This is why we're to thank God in *all* circumstances ... you can (by your choosing) thank Him for all that is happening, and to thank Him for the solution that He is right now, at this moment, bringing to you. But if you dwell on the negative feelings (which are actually negative vibrations that you're putting out -- everything is energy, including all matter - study quantum physics to grasp this), you are drawing more negativity to yourself. Like creates like, and like attracts like.

You have a CHOICE. You are not a helpless recipient/victim here.

You can assist your body in behaving as it was created to, by choosing to think on the good things, choosing to believe that it's awesomely and wonderfully made, and that your body knows how to restore itself to balance ... for this is how God has designed it to operate.

Your mind affects your brain, which affects your body -- do you see the awesome part you play in this?

Change your thinking, and you change your perspective, which changes your experience.

It's our *minds* that need to be renewed (to become aligned with our spirits), and then our bodies follow...

Perhaps consider asking God why you seem so drawn to the drama/trauma of life ... ask Him to show you what's at the root of this ... your peace is at stake.

Much love!

Shalom, Dena

A Conversation ...

I'm having this conversation with someone who sees a bit differently than I do (which happens a lot, LOL!) ... and I notice that in having the conversation, as I respond, clarity comes. I notice that I often write things I didn't know I knew, 'til I wrote them. I notice that I learn in process ... that it's not about "figuring it all out," but observing what unfolds along the way. Quite a relief to this former anal-queen-perfectionist, LOL!

I'll share the conversation here, in case someone else can relate in some way (my words are in bold; theirs are in italics):


I appreciate your thoughts ... and we see much the same. The differences have to do with the uniqueness of each of our journeys ... neither of us started in the same place, and each of us has had unique things to overcome, to see, to understand, to rise above. While He is both Guide and Goal, and we will end up in the same fuller-understanding, our pathways along the way to all truth are likely (if not guaranteed) to appear dissimilar.

I can tell you what's true for me, as I've experienced Him in my life, and you can tell me what's true for you, as you've experienced Him in your life ... and there will indeed be much overlap. However, it would be folly and presumption for any in-process/finite/limited-perspectived human being to tell another in-process/finite/limited-perspectived human being what IS, and what IS NOT true for all beings, at one time. God meets us where we are, and leads us ever-more into all truth.

Our instructions, along the way, during this transformation/mind-renewal process we call "life", is to love ... to love all others as ourselves, whether we perceive the "other" to be brother/sister, friend, or "enemy."

And so, as I share my heart with you, with anyone, I am not saying "this is true for you"... I can make observations about what I perceive, at this point in time, and I can tell you what I perceive to be true for me, at this point in time (allowing for the possibility, if not probability, that God will lead me into a deeper truth that renders a former truth merely a stepping stone), but I am not making the assumption that my perceived truth is your applicable truth. I wouldn't put that on you ... neither do I accept another's truth as something to be put upon me. IF (& when), however, the Spirit within me says to me, "they've just reminded you of a truth that I've given you - receive it with joy", then I do so ... and I will celebrate that moment with you, grateful that you've cooperated with Him in my recognizing (re-cognizing, re-knowing) a Truth that He's given me.

(whew! can I get long-winded or what?!? LOL!)

With all that as preamble, I'll respond to what you wrote:

Dena, thank you for the kind words. Although the Lord is at work everywhere, everything is not his work. The Holy Spirit is given to lead us into all truth. If everything that happens was of him, then it would all be truth, and we would lead no one to be the truth discerner and teacher.

I appreciate that this is your perspective ... I would have once shared it with you. I no longer do ... I do see that God is in everything, that everything is of Him (for He tells us in scripture that He created even what we call "evil" for His purposes). God comes to me disguised as my own life. I receive it all as from His hand, and I let it unfold to show me the gift hiding within the presentation. I figure it's my perspective that needs adjusting when I resist what's happening ... and I notice that what I resist, persists. But when I thank Him for whatever is happening (whether or not I understand it, on the surface of it), I move from my perspective to His (for I have the Mind of Christ), and I'm better able to receive the gift, and to learn from whatever He is showing me in that circumstance. I confess, I'm sometimes more successful at this than others ... I'm very much a person-in-process ... but I even learn from my "mistakes", so it's all good, as He says it is.

The nature of the kingdom of God is both "Now" and "Not Yet". This is a concept that describes the tension we find in the Christian life. We are seated with him in heavenly places both now and not yet... There is always a coming reality that is greater than that which we have seen, and yet we have seen it. And since we have seen it, we know him by what he has given us... His son. Not by the creation in which we live, although it speaks of God, we would not have needed the manifestation of the son if we could fully know God without Him.

I appreciate that you see it this way, and, again, I once did as well. While there's no need to "compare" (or to compete) with our various perspectives (neither is "better" ... each just serves, or does not serve, where we are), this perspective no longer rings true for me, with where I am.

I see that it's indeed our perspective that the Kingdom is both "now" and "not yet", because of our experience (which, ironically enough, is dependent upon our perspective ... what we believe determines what we will experience). I now understand the Kingdom to be that which cannot be observed with our natural senses ... and I notice that Jesus told us this is so ("My Kingdom does not come with observation, but is in your midst."). I believe that the Kingdom is, and has always been, a NOW reality ... but that it is only spiritually discerned ... always available for those who will have eyes to see, and ears to hear ... seemingly out of reach for those who believe that God has to *do something* to make it come, in the future, in a tangible/physical manner (which would go contrary to Jesus' words, that it won't come by observation). And, in a historical-timeline perspective, I believe it already came.

So, if I could put it into words (which are always so inadequate), I'd say that I see/experience the Kingdom as NOW, and it is seen/experienced by us "waking up" to it's reality, rather than being seduced by the illusion of the physical realm.

It is important not to limit our understanding of what he has said to our own understanding. Now that will bring in some tension...

Very true ... and I observe that Christianity has taught us to do just that -- to limit how we experience God to our own "approved" collective-understanding. I've discovered that those human traditions no longer serve me. I'm discovering that I have to be "out of my mind" in order to experience God.

The Son was given to reveal the nature and character of the Father. It is written that the Father was in Him. However, it was not also written that the fullness of the Godhead is manifest in every person, even though it is in him we live and move and have our being.

I believe that while what is written is a way for us to begin to experience God and His truth, it is not the summation of all truth. I believe that scripture itself teaches us that. While I greatly appreciate the foundation of the written word, I no longer limit myself to what's written ... nor do I believe I'm meant to. I see that I'm meant to follow Christ, not the Bible... and I previously experienced the latter as a substitute for the former. I believe spiritual maturity requires moving from the tangible (the scriptures in hand) to the spiritual (the Living Word within) ... from the external, to the internal. From rules to relationship. From the observed to the experienced.

I have come to experience, and thus believe, that God is manifest within every person ... it's our perspective (and our human traditions) that tell us otherwise. I notice that there is no other Source of Life, but God. There is no competing life-source "out there." I believe that everything, seen and unseen, is a manifestation of the Life of God. I see Oneness all around me ... and that we are either aware of it, or unaware of it. But even if we are asleep to it, we can awaken. In fact, I'm delighted to observe that many, many are awakening, to this awareness of Oneness...

The ability to function in the kingdom of God is found in being able to live in tension between two seemingly opposite truths. It feels just like walking on water... And it is glorious! Amen...

Now THIS I heartily resonate with! Beautifully put! We do have to see that what we see is not really real. The truer-truth is found beyond the illusion of our physical surroundings ... even quantum physics is showing us that all physicality is but an illusion (love it when science catches up with God, LOL!).

It's a glorious thing to come to see Him as He Really Is, and to discover ourselves as We Really Are. He, and His truth, are mind-blowingly too good to NOT be true..!

Shalom, Dena

I've noticed that my prayers are changing lately ... without me consciously deciding to change.

It used to be that I saw God as withholding things from me ... almost dangling them before me, just out of reach, waiting for me to get the prayer right. Y'know, to say the "right" prayer, to have the "right" attitude, to use the right words, the right body-position, to (I may as well say it) use the right "incantation" to get God to do what I wanted. As if God were a cosmic vending machine, and I had to have the exact change to get the goodies.

I moved away from that imagery a while ago (whew!), but for a while, I continued to try to "get it right" -- albeit more subtly.

I had the impression that God was a bit disappointed in me ... even frustrated with me, and perhaps even running out of patience (yikes!). Would I get zapped in some sort of way? Was I nearing the end of my warranty? Sheesh, the stakes could be pretty dire here!

Then, I came to see that the only way someone can be disappointed in another, is to have an unrealistic expectation of them. As a parent, I can think, "you should've known better." Truth is, they didn't know better (even if I'd told them better) ... they're a human child, and the nature of a human child is to be a bit (ok, a lot) oblivious, and to learn, even if the learning has to come the hard way (LOL, in my case, when does it not?). And, as a human parent, I can indeed have an unrealistic expectation of how *I* think my child *should* think/speak/act (& especially when I erroneously believe that my identity is wrapped up in my children making ME look good -- egads!).

However, God is not a human parent. He is the Good Father... the perfect (complete) Parent. He, being omniscient, knows all things as they truly are ... God, knowing who I am, and how *HE* made me to be, cannot possibly have an unrealistic expectation of me. Before I think/say/do a thing, He already knows it (He's outside of time, in the realm of the Absolute). So then, how could God EVER be disappointed in me..? He knows that He's given me freedom to make choices, and that choices bring about consequences, and that consequences bring about experience, and that experience teaches us what we need to learn. Even if it takes umpteen times of going around that same ol' rock, 'til we finally connect the dots, and have our own "aha" moment. As the prodigal son did ... waking up in the pig stye, coming to his own senses, realizing who he was (child of the Father), and doing what a child naturally would do -- returning home.

I've watched 8 children learning to walk ... I saw them take their first faltering steps, saw the delight of discovery on their determined little faces ... observed what (inevitably!) happened when each of them fell on their own little bottoms. In every case, they turned to me, to see how I was responding to their fall... as if my response would form the framework for how they would perceive of their experience. It never occurred to me to scold them for falling, to shame them for not "getting it right the first time." My reaction, every time (even as an imperfect human parent), was to laugh with delight, to say, "you fell down, it's ok". I was utterly delighted with their attempt to step out, besotted with joy in their faltering attemps -- I knew that they were doing the best they could, given what they then had to work with. AND, I knew that they would improve ... I knew that falling was part of the learning process. Falling, in the larger scheme of things, is GOOD.

So too, I dare to believe, God sees us, when we falteringly, fumblingly, feebly stumble. The question is, when we turn to God, to see His reaction (by which to form the framework for our perception), what do we see on His face? Do we see a smile of delight, even His head thrown back in laughter, in joy? Or do we envision a scowling, disappointed, even angry face, and hear the "you should've done better" message....?

Can we dare to believe that the former is the real reaction of God, and that the latter is our own projection onto Him?

Do we believe in the God in whose image we are created, or do we believe in a god whom we have created in our own image..?


Back to how I've changed how I pray...

Coming to see this God who is delighted in me (a God who really is too good to NOT be true), I've come to where I no longer feel the need to ask (to beg!) for Him to give me good things. I've come to where knowing who He is, knowing how He sees me, is the "goodest" thing He could ever give me ... and I already have that (the only question being, am I aware of it?).

I've moved from a "fearship" with God, into a friendship with God. I am the most astonished and delighted and awe-struck woman I know, that this has happened to me.

Within that perspective, that relationship, I have come to where I now just thank God for whatever comes my way. I trust that all things are indeed working out for my good (no matter how I perceive them when they come to me). I trust that whatever happens is what I *need*. I trust that pain gives birth to growth.

"Even before you ask, I have answered." Says God.

So, when I'm in the midst of a "problem," I can pray, "Thank You that the solution for this situation has already been made manifest, and that it will be revealed. Thank You that I will learn from this. Thank You that you will enable me to see this for the good that it is. Thank You that You always give me just what I need, and that you will enable me to recognize that reality."

It's a hard prayer to pray, when the pain is thick, when the fear is tangible, when the evidence screams "this is bad!" But, it never fails to alter my perspective, to give me hope, to bring me to peace. And IN that peace, I can have the clarity to see whatever it is I need to see, whatever it is I need to do.

So, I've stopped asking God for things, and have started thanking Him for things.

God comes to me disgused as my life.

Amen.

Shalom, Dena