Saturday, July 3, 2010

Honor the Process ...

It's been far too long since I blogged ... again.

LOL -- how many bloggers out there begin their infrequent blog posts with that very statement...?!? How blase...!

Here I am, finding myself in need of sharing what I'm seeing ... finding the need to connect. And so I'm going with that. Going with what Is.

I'm finding myself in a place where I do not want to be ... physically, emotionally, relationally, situationally, financially. It's a tough and painful place. If I could change this current reality, I would.

At least, I think I would.

But if I were to project myself into the future, and look back, would I really change where/how I am...?

Dunno.

And how to know?

There are those who say that wherever one finds oneself is exactly where one needs to be.

Ok, I get the concept. Reality prevails ... I am here, now. At least, for now. I could be elsewhere tomorrow ... but I'm here, now. So, for now, here is where I need to be.

So far, I'm tracking with me.

Deepak Chopra once wrote, "Whatever relationships/situations you have attracted into your life at any given time, are the relationships/situations you need to be in at that time." (Note: I will be delving more into the concept of what/how we attract, in future blog posts.)

What I am currently experiencing is a result of how and what I thought and felt, in my past... both long-ago past, and recently-experienced past. I have been learning, in ways both profound and painful, that our thoughts create things. We do this all the time, both unconsciously and consciously -- vast emphasis on the unconscious-creating that we foist upon ourselves and others ..!

I figure it's about time I discover how it is that I'm doing this, and to thus become a more intentional creator in this life ...!

We're here to discover who we are ... largely by experiencing who we are not. We are who we are, at the core, but we experience this process as a *becoming*. We shed who we are not, one bit at a time, or even an entire layer at a time, and the real Us is revealed underneath ... we see this Self with more and more clarity as we go.

There are people who are waiting for who I am becoming. There are people for whom I am waiting for who they are becoming.

And there are other (more rare) people, with whom I get to experience the becoming, mid-process ...

I guess I see it, for now, that at every given moment, we are each and everyone in the very process of both being and becoming. I see that we all do the best we can at the time -- we each take in as much as we can at the time. As I look ahead, I see that the road is curved ... perhaps I am currently being prepared to handle what awaits around the bend.

Perhaps it's best that I don't yet see what's beyond the bend ...

OR - is it that I get to choose...? That I am an intricate and invaluable player in the process of how my life unfolds...? What is pre-determined, and what is determined by how I think and feel here and now...?

I want to explore that more in coming days!

Here's how Webster defines "process": "a natural phenomena marked by gradual changes that lead toward a particular result."

Yeah, I see how that happens in real life -- I experience something, and change. I discover more about myself, others, situations, and change some more. In order to know who I am, I need to experience who I am not ... how else to do this..?!? How else did we imagine we would navigate this?

It's not a course to study -- it's a life to live.

And, I believe that we don't fail. No matter what others think or say. We only learn.

And, I believe that the conditions we face, whatever they are, do not define us. They just provide the context for who we are, and who we are not. My experiences show me what I was thinking and feeling ... they show me what I brought into being, what I allowed, what I attracted to myself.

For the purpose of learning.

So that I can create my life with more clarity.

I see that we are here to remember that we are connected to the Divine Source of All That Is ... that, as a result, we are divine. It's not arrogance to discover truth about ourselves. We are all miraculous and powerful. And I learn this, more and more, each time I fall down and get back up ... each time I experience loss and recover ... each time I make a choice and change my mind. Each and every experience moves me along the road of life, around the next curve.

I find myself expecting to be delighted around the next curve. And why not? Why not attract what's delightful, rather than to create what's depressing...?

More on this tomorrow ...

(yes, I intend to blog again tomorrow ... and why not?)

Shalom, Dena

1 comment:

Harry Riley said...

I find that if I resist where I am, it persists. My resistance gives it energy. If I fully accept the Here and the Now I'm free to move to the next Here Now. Otherwise there's a Cosmic Stuckness:)