The Magic of Self-Love ...

Bonus post!

This just came in and it begs to be shared ...! Indulge!

The Magic of Self-Love

by Aine Belton


Loving yourself is easy when you own your inherent innocence and worth and acknowledge the divinity that you are.

Your essential true self – the you beyond your personality, identity and negative beliefs, is so ineffably beautiful, loving and magnificent, when you awaken to it, self-love is inevitable.

In the light of self-love you come to realize that you are not your darkness, failings or mistakes, and that your negative self-concepts are sourced in misunderstandings about yourself and life.

To not love yourself is to be blind to your true nature and the loving nature of the universe. It is to be caught in the lies of ego and shrouding traps such as guilt, shame, undeserving and self-loathing.

“There is nothing but love, and all else is illusion.”
- Dr. John Demartini

When you awaken to your inherent nature, self-love is inevitable.

Forgiving yourself for perceived ‘wrong doings’ and ‘mistakes’ can help you let go of and release more of what you are not so you can open to and embrace more of who you are, and the love at the heart of your being.

It is easy to love what’s beautiful in you, but it’s the ugly parts that need your love the most.

To truly love yourself is to love yourself unconditionally beyond reasons why.

To love yourself because you did a good deed, got a pay rise, secured a new job, are popular, funny, attractive or wealthy, is conditional. Love yourself for who you are, your strengths and weaknesses. And love yourself because you are - that you exist.

The essence of who you are is love itself. You are born of love, returning to love.

There is nothing you need do to win that love and nothing you can do to lose it, for you are loved completely.

States of pain and constriction are symptoms that you are out of alignment with truth - the truth of who you are and the true nature of reality.

Self-love is ultimately self-knowing. It is accepting yourself compassionately in entirety and understanding that you are more than your personality and identity. You are pure spirit.

All that you desire is yours to receive. Love unlocks the door to that receiving. When you awaken to the love that you are abundance reins, and there is a renewed flow of giving and receiving between yourself, others and the universe.

In the wake of love, dreams come true. Wounds heal and the pain of separation lessens.

You become free from ego games and agendas that can otherwise thwart your growth and success and side-track you from the truth.

Fear, loss, worthlessness, loneliness and other constricting states transform in the light of love.

"There is no difficulty that enough love will not conquer; no disease that enough love will not heal; no door that enough love will not open."
- Emmet Fox

When you love yourself neediness subsides and you relinquish futile attempts to ‘get love’ from ‘out there’, and the control, manipulation, dependency, sacrifice and struggle that can otherwise ensue.

The ego’s quest to earn love, and to compete, compare and prove your lovability dissolves in the nourishing repose and revitalizing wonder of self-love.

You are the one you have been waiting for; it is your love and the truth of your being that lies wait within.

If you’re not having the kinds of experiences you want in your relationships, the key is to awaken to this infinite supply within, and open to receive this limitless reservoir of self-love and universal love.

Your Higher Self, the eternal transcendent being that you really are, loves you more than you may ever now. It loves you totally and unconditionally.

[To connect to your Higher Self, go HERE.]

The cliché ‘No one can love you until you love yourself’, is true in that, until you love yourself you will not be able to wholeheartedly receive love from others. You may be blind or blinkered to that love. You may deny, discount or avoid it. You may be cynical and doubt it. You may push it away or sabotage it. You may feel you do not deserve it. You may even fail to attract it due to blocks around your lovability and corresponding limiting self-beliefs.

In loving yourself you fill up with nectar from within and can radiate and share that sweetness with others and the world. The wondrous vibration of love will exude and attract happy, harmonious, beautiful realities in line with your heart’s desires.

You are source, not subject, of your world.

When you love yourself, the world will love you back.

You judge others less as you judge yourself less. Compassion is a natural by-product of self-love.

In loving yourself you are more connected to your Higher Self – the vast being that you are - and are more open, trusting, loving and happy.

You become less self-conscious and more spontaneous, less self-absorbed and more giving, less of a victim and more of a leader, contributor and inspiration to others.

Your life is graced with flow.

Problems and struggle lessen and ease.

You stop fighting yourself and others and start joining, giving forth, celebrating and having fun!

You revel in the wonder of who you are, the love of the universe, and the love the universe has for you.

Practical ways to love yourself!

There are, of course, infinite ways to love and to care for yourself. The possibilities are endless, and will depend on what is most appropriate for you at a given time, what brings you greatest joy, and what honours and fulfulls your heart’s wishes and soul’s purpose.

You already do love yourself, likely more than you are aware, yet if self-love feels new to you and you want to experience and develop more of it, there’s no shame in what may initially feel like ‘faking it till you make it’.

When you start to act more loving to yourself you will ignite a renewed relationship with yourself and step onto a path to a blossom-rich horizon. You will also reprogram your subconscious mind with a new way of being and relating with yourself.

Loving yourself may involve pampering and treating yourself in luxurious ways, yet it may also include less glamorous endeavours, for self-love is about doing what most serves you and your soul at a given time, and honouring and respecting yourself accordingly.

Loving yourself could be:

~Cleaning your home, organising papers and accounts, eating healthy food, paying bills, clearing debts, etc.

~Ending sabotaging patterns, habits or addictions.

~Seeking the help, healing and support that will help you make the transition to a brighter future.

~Setting new inspiring and enlivening goals, raising your standards and reaching for more.

~No longer sacrificing to please others.

~Being honest and intimate with yourself and others.

~No longer settling for less and setting respecting boundaries.

~Living somewhere that you truly love, or transforming, decorating or renovating your existing home to surround yourself with an environment that is beautiful, meaningful and heart-warming.

~Nourishing and caring for your body, such as eating healthy food and exercising regularly. You might join a gym, get a personal trainer, or begin fun healthy activities like salsa, yoga, or a new sport or activity like hiking or running.

~Doing 'nothing' and spending time relaxing, reflecting, de-stressing or simply ‘being’.

~Treating yourself to the pleasures of massage, a facial, pedicure, beauty treatments or a new hair-do.

~Buying new clothes that reflect your truer self.

~Taking up or renewing a creative hobby or passion, be that singing, writing, walking, painting, sailing, or photography, for example.

~Listening to and honouring your feelings.

~Going on weekends away, short breaks and holidays to inject greater fun, happiness and adventure into your life.

~Being in touch with friends and loved ones, and expressing the love you have for them, which will be nourishing not just to them, but to you as well.

~Speaking kindly to yourself, seeing your value and goodness, affirming your positives and being grateful to yourself.

~Having a night out on the town: going out for a fabulous dinner, dancing, to the movies or theatre, whether alone, with a friend a friend, or romantic partner.

~Meditating.

~Being true to yourself, upholding principles and standing your ground if required.

~If you tend to save or hoard money, it could be having a care-free ‘splurge’.

~Treating yourself does not need to be a great expense, however, and can be having breakfast in the garden on a sunny morning, taking a walk in the afternoon, having a bubble bath, a candlelight dinner in, going for a swim or watching the sunset.

~Spending time in nature to bask in its beauty and grace. We all have favourite nature spots. For some it is the ocean side, for others the beauty of a spring meadow, for some it is to walk down country lanes, or enter a forest or grove. Perhaps you love riversides or waterfalls, or wide vistas and open landscapes with far reaching views, or hill tops and mountains.

~Appreciating yourself for all your gifts, qualities, strengths and achievements, and having compassion and love for any perceived 'ugly sides', weaknesses, stresses, trials and tribulations.

~Forgiving yourself for all 'mistakes' the lost or wounded you may have made, and letting go of negative self-concepts and beliefs.


"All my limitations are self-imposed and my liberation can only come from true self-love."

- Max C. Robinson

Breathing it all in ...

Shalom & Namaste ~
Dena

Project Knowing Infinite Self: Step One

So here we are ... on the first step, on the first day, of a 33-day exploration of discovering the Infinite Self ...!

Wheeeeee..!

We're going to plunge right in with the very most important concept to grasp (are you ready?!?): "I am God."

Ok, not that I, Dena, in and of myself, are God. Really, I'm not trying to start a new religion, or gather disciples, inspire worship, nor inflate my ego (honestly, I do not look good in funny hats).

But, before we go any further, it's imperative that we accept the notion of the God Force, the very nature/essence/energy of God is within us ... comprises us ... IS us.

God is in us, as us.

Most folks either discount the notion of God, or else externalize God -- as a separate being out there, somewhere. Once we internalize this reality, this force, this energy, then it's no longer a vague concept, but an actuality ... we can begin to feel this very energy. And it can (& will) transform us.

Here's what Stu has to say:

There is a guided method to this journey of ours; it's not as haphazard as most think. I believe that the infinite you, that higher energy dwelling inside your being, had a vision of what it was going to be getting into in this lifetime. I don't believe that you came here by accident - that you suddenly plopped into a little diaper and thought, What the hell am I doing here? I believe that your evolution here on the earth plane is so powerful, so sacred, so spiritually dynamic and special, that the infinity within you had an overview... the infinity within you had a perception prior to your birth.

So, our first step is to embrace/accept the concept of I am God.

This is not as egotistical as it may first appear ... so hold on. Stay with me. This is not about showing off, or worshipping our egos. This is the humble realization and acceptance that the God Force is all there is ... that everything and everyone is imbued with sacredness ... with divine energy ... that there is nothing else BUT this divine energy, comprising all things.

Honestly, it would be a wee bit egotistical to insist that you are exempt from this equation ... that you are somehow "other."

Sure, internalization of the God Force can feel awkward -- for those who have no concept of God, and for those taught to project God "out there/separate". But, if you happen to have a concept of God outside of yourself, then just choose to mentally bring God home -- back into you. It's not that God ever "left" ... or was elsewhere. It's just that you need to perceive what IS.

The next thing to do, once we've internalized God, is to respect our current evolution. Meaning: accept where you now find yourself. (I know, I know ... very tough to do when your life-circumstances are less than you desire them to be ... I know!). When we fight against, or complain about, our circumstances ... not only is it a waste of energy, and disrespectful to the spiritual self, but it actually creates *more of the same* ... for what we resist persists ... and what we focus on, we attract.

So, the effective/cooperative thing to do is to accept what is ... bearing in mind (paradoxically, it seems) that almost anything can be improved, and that things do change -- this is not a static universe -- and that we are co-creators.

Try saying this to yourself (& yeah, fake it if you have to, at first):

The infinity inside me -- that part of me that is God -- loves and respects this human evolution of mine. It loves and respects where I find myself and my current circumstances, so I will do the same -- even though the circumstances of my life right now may be less than best. All these things are a part of my evolution. I can transcend them and go beyond them.

The trick is to step back from the ego's perspective (usually of lack, fear, separation), and to instead choose to see life from a more infinite view -- it's detachment. Not detachment from life, but detachment from the ego's view of life. In this very simple-yet-courageous choice of acceptance, we begin an instantaneous healing process.

(collective sigh of relief ...)

Circumstances that we find ourselves in are neither good nor bad -- they just ARE. It's part of our evolution, our soul's purpose ... our learning experience, our challenge ... it's what we signed up for, folks (& also what we have attracted to ourselves) ..! :)

Back to Stu:

The concept of I Am God says, "I am eternal. I am beyond the definitions of the ego. I am beyond death. So, therefore, I will gradually go beyond fear. Fear is a disease of the ego. Negative energy and what we consider unpleasant experiences are just contradictions of the ego's opinion."

There is a great spiritual maturity in accepting where we are, who we are, what we are.

And ... we also have to accept that it is WE who create the major part of what we experience as reality ... (as well as part of our destiny). We are here to be co-creators ... and we are doing so all the time ... with our beliefs (known or unknown), our thoughts, and our emotions ... (POWERful sources of energy!) ... we do so either unconsciously or consciously -- our choice.

I want to continue on this path of discovery ... I want to discover what's unconsciously in the way of me being, and experiencing, my Infinite Self ... onward!

Shalom & Namaste ~
Dena

Project Knowing Infinite Self: Preamble

A bit of preamble first ...

Since much of this is derived from the Tao de Ching, let's get on the same page about this ancient and profound writing ...

First, Tao is pronounced "Dow" (yeah, like Dow-Jones) ... so don't make yourself appear to be all ignorant, and stick a "T" in there. And don't ask me why the English translators didn't just spell it "Dow" or even "Dao." I know not these things. It's a cosmic mystery, like why we have an appendix, or why we park on a driveway, and drive on a parkway ...

The Tao de Ching (loose translation: The Book of the Way) was written in about 500 BC, in China ... by Lao Tzu (which just means "old man" ... so whether there was a real dude named "Old Man" by his parents, or whether it's a compilation by several old dudes, or whether it's merely metaphorical, nobody knows -- add it to the aforementioned mysteries, shrug, and move on).

The Tao is not a religion -- it's a spiritual/philosophical idea -- rather than delivering dogma, rules, regulations (envision me spitting out dog-germs), it offers suggestions for a more enlightened and fulfilling life. To give you a bit of it's flavor, here are the opening lines (& here's the rest, for those who want to dive in):

The tao that can be told
is not the eternal Tao
The name that can be named
is not the eternal Name.

The unnamable is the eternally real.
Naming is the origin
of all particular things.

Free from desire, you realize the mystery.
Caught in desire, you see only the manifestations.

Yet mystery and manifestations
arise from the same source.
This source is called darkness.

Darkness within darkness.
The gateway to all understanding.
...

According to an unnamed, yet venerated, teacher of Stuart Wilde's (whom he refers to as "Boogaloo" - ha!), one cannot really comprehend the Tao, or the Infinite Self intellectually -- it's beyond the mind. The only way to comprehend it is through "heightened awareness and feeling."

Not the mind, but the heart. Not the intelligence, but intuition. There it is again.

Here's how Stu puts it (if he can call his venerated teacher "Boogaloo", I can call him "Stu"):

To really comprehend it, as well as the angelic nature of your journey, you first have to release from the ego's somewhat tight, limited perception and accept your true spiritual power. When you are ready to release and detach and let go, you gain everything.

(I find myself hearing the deeper-and-truer-for-me meaning of the words, "seek first the Kingdom, and all other things will be given to you.")

Pausing. Breathing. Pondering. Digesting. On a whole new level.

Pain does that, y'know ... it gets your attention and increases your capacity to receive ... it's a catalyst for growth (& really, who would bother to grow/change unless something hurt?), out of the sheer desperation for relief ... so here I am, brought to a place of recognizing my absolute need for reception of that which is deeper ...

Spiritual growth is neither convenient, nor comfortable. It's neither fun, nor easy to discard most (often all) of one's previously-conditioned-and-clung-to beliefs and - we tend to hold such things as "sacred" -- and we will defend them to the nth degree -- attacking/maligning/rejecting anyone who threatens them (which can be done merely from the suggestion to *look* at them). We will thus ally with our own enslavement to what limits us -- those false core beliefs. But we cannot get to the Infinite Self without returning back to those old roots -- those memories and experiences (remembered or not, in which we formed those limiting beliefs) that continue to limit and condition us into Who We Are NOT.

Looking deeply at ourselves is uncomfortable -- no, make that painful. Even terrifying. Most of us will go to inordinate lengths to ensure that we never do so. Most of us would rather limp through life, coping with what is crippling (but oh-so-familiar), than to do the courageous and challenging and liberating work of self-examination. And it's not a one-time endeavor, either. It's a way of life.

Here's how Stu puts it:

It's difficult to learn to control the ego and discipline the mind without it reacting. However, it's a vital part of the journey, and you have to raise your energy gradually, over a period of time ... energy seeks its own level. Even though something or someone can inspire you or teach you, in the end the only way you will sustain a higher energy is to create it for yourself.

In the laws of physics, a subatomic particle can borrow energy for a millisecond, moving to a faster orbit around a nucleus. However, the particle can't keep that borrowed energy indefinitely. So whatever energy is borrowed in this second has to be paid back a second later, and the particle returns to where it is comfortable, at the energy level it had before.

Spiritual growth follows the same rules. You can be inspired by a hymn, by a fantastic sermon, words out of a book; but you can only borrow that inspiration. In the end, raising your energy involves discipline, which means working on yourself. There is no particular time when you can say, "I've done it, I've finished." Embracing the Infinite Self is a perpetual process, unfolding within you forever and ever.

As a man thinks in his heart, so is he ...

Whatsoever you sow, you shall reap ...

Take every thought captive ...

Yeah ... examining our feelings, our thoughts ... tracing them back to their origins ... discovering whether that is our own belief, or that of another ... choosing how to then create our own reality ... yeah, that takes some intentionality ... some discipline ... some conscious participation.

I see that I am responsible for my life ... I chose it, I'm living it, and I'm co-creating it. It's happening, whether I realize it or not ... may as well get conscious about it!

I'd like to get out of my own way, to discover my Infinite Self, and to live from there.

I have to ... the alternative is unacceptable.

Shalom & Namaste ~
Dena

Wanna Explore with Me?!?

If there's ANYthing I've been learning from the messages-of-my-life lately, it's that I need to take an inner journey ... I need to discover Who I Really Am ...

Not in mere concept.

Not from what others tell me.

Not even from what others experience.

This is something I need to experience for myself.

I need to meet mySelf, know mySelf, become intimate with mySelf, and love mySelf.

Without that, I have little of value to give to anyone else ... for mySelf is being hidden beneath the fears I harbor ... under all the unquestioned core beliefs I unknowingly cherish and protect ... and while mySelf can, and does, come through, it cannot do so freely and fully, until I've reclaimed my own inner identity and power.

Now, it's one thing to know this ... it's quite another thing to get from HERE to THERE.

So, I put it out there to the Universe, kinda-sorta like this, "Ok, all y'all ... Cosmic Dudes and Dudettes ... Angels, Guides, God/Goddess ... All That Is ... Source of All ... You know Who you are. I need your help. Big time. I need some serious guidance, clarity, and most especially ... to know who I am, why I'm here ... what is my soul's purpose. I really want to make the most of this life ... and I need help. Please. Please-please-please. Oh, and some signs along the way, for encouragement and direction -- well, that would be nice, too. Thanks."

It's especially effective if such a request is made in the shower. A long, hot shower. Complete with honest, heart-sourced tears and hollering. But no candles.

Fast-forward to one of the many nights I was making a solo-drive from Portland, OR, back to where I live ... (Portland is where the action is, and I'm frequently up there for various spiritual and/or artistic adventures). It was a gorgeous night ... the sunset was particularly spectacular (sky-blue-pink, with orangey-streaks, and Venus making her debut over the coastal mountain range) ... and the full Harvest moon was nearly hoarding up the entire Eastern sky (all of this gandering was causing meandering while driving!) ... and I happened to stumble upon a little radio station being broadcast out of Nevada ... could hardly pick it up. But I heard a man talking about all manner of spiritual changes that were happening in our world, at this time ... and he mentioned a book of his, "Infinite Self" ... a self-guided discovery of getting to know your True Self. So my ears perked up (every time I hear that phrase, I think of Vulcans, but never mind), and I tuned in ...

Arriving back at my computer, I searched for the book, found it (at a vast discount - *score*!), and through the magic of cyberspace, got it mailed to me ... it was delivered in two days, voila!

As is usual, I currently have close to a dozen books that I'm reading, dabbling in, thumbing through, and/or waiting to get to. But, by the time I had read the intro and first chapter, I knew that not only did I need to read this one NOW, but that I wanted to share it HERE ... it always helps me to digest new information by not only reading about it, but also writing about it ... and it may spark something in someone else, too ... bonus.

But, just so y'know ... this is really for Me. :)

The author is Stuart Wilde ... a British, brilliant, irreverent sort of guy (brilliant and irreverent always-and-forever being irresistible to me!) ... who manages to take the ancient and deep wisdom of the Tao de Ching (specifically the "33 Energies of Man"), and bring it down to the earthly plane ... where, I notice, most of us currently live.

Here's his goal:

The point of trying to attain a higher spiritual energy of this sort is so that it can set you free, and liberate you from emotional disquiet -- and so you can teach it to your brothers and sisters and set them free... I like energies that are "down here," that help you transcend ordinary things, such as your loopy mother-in-law who's driving your crackers. That's the kind of user-friendly mysticism I like... if you can get to the end of the 33 steps, and if you follow through with action, it will raise your energy, give you awareness, and set you free. Eventually you pass through a doorway to straddle two worlds: this one and another more spiritual, infinite world that is in an evolution alongside ours.

I like that -- straddling two worlds. Yes, I want more awareness, but not for the purpose that I can then float nebulously in the air. I figure we're here on purpose -- that matter matters ... that we're here to enjoy relationships, to learn, to co-create. To be HAPPY.

And the primary relationship, as I keep re-learning ... is with the Self. The True Self. I'm willing to take the next 33 days of delving into this, and doing the suggested actions, as a sort of experiment -- will I be more aware of my own Infinite Self, of my true identity, of my inner power, 33 days from now?

Anyone else wanna explore this with me...? Chime in!

Here's what Stuart says:

Of course you have to have the desire to change and grow. That desire often starts out from a negative place -- as dissatisfaction with your current circumstances or the people around you. You ache for an opportunity to slip away to something new.

Sometimes the great and wonderful goodness that is the invisible universe around us helps us by delivering a sudden change, one that marks a special turning point in our lives ... something different happens that sends your story into another direction. When the current energy of your life gets stale and used up, the emotions, feelings and discontent from deep within create for you a "plot point" [when everything changes -- this is orchestrated by your Infinite Self]. It often has spiritual or physical implications.

Maybe you get sick ... for others, their plot point is whacking a tree -- that usually turns 'em around. Or there's a divorce, a death in the family, a bankruptcy, or something weird happens ... the kind of action that will turn a mundane life into a sacred quest... Sometimes we generate "accidents" in order to escape from an impossible situation, thereby generating the change we need; and sometimes we create "accidents" from a lack of balance when we are deep in the grip of the ego. So, you shouldn't get emotionally upset. We are all infinite. And all events - positive or negative - are just part of our journey from ego to spirit. Some just take a shortcut.

If there's a shortcut to be had, I'm in!

I'll launch into Day One tomorrow ... anybody gonna play with me...?

Shalom & Namaste ~
Dena

Fade ...

This song speaks to me on so very many levels ... I hear it expressed by my heart ... I hear it also as the Voice of my Soul, my True Self (that which is One with the Divine) speaking to me ... I just hear it ... and I respond.

Yes.

Very yes.



So be it.

Shalom & Namaste ~
Dena

Lyrics:
When you walk out of my light, the colour fades, the colour fades.
When you lose your way and walk alone, the colour fades and runs
Like tears down my face.

I can give you life. I can give you hope. I can give your heart the love its looking for.
Give you feeling, I can bring you joy. I can make you who you are. Who you are.

When you walk a rugged road, your heart is heavy. Darker than the evening sky.
When the path is sinking sand, I am reaching out to pull you through to higher land.

The colour fades when you walk out of my light.
The colour fades when you choose to walk alone.
The colour fades when your path is sinking sand.

Keep going, keep going, keep going ...!

Dear Persistent Girl....

There really is something you were born to do...just you. There is a plan for your life, there is a mission you were created to accomplish and there is a life that is meant JUST for you.

You were not born randomly...you were not an accident, and you are not a number.

Keep holding on. Stay with it. There is so much learning that takes place...so much training, so much boot camp that is so necessary before it all unfolds. Have patience and keep listening to your heart.

You were born for something great and unforgettable. You were born to do things that would never ever be done if you did not do them.

Keep going, keep going, keep going.

You are so loved.

xoxo

[messages from the Brave Girls Club]

Oooooookay ... I can keep going. I can hang on. I can have patience (or develop it!). I can trust in the Bigger Plan. I can choose to see the Bigger Picture. I can Stay With It. I can let it all unfold. I can. I can. I can. I CAN!

Because, really ... what are the options, otherwise...?

I'm not sure I was equipped with a quitting gene ...

Shalom & Namaste ~
Dena


P.S. Yeah ... I know, I have to keep believing in that "great and unforgettable" part, too...

Listen to the "Right" Voices ...

Got another lovely message in my in-box today ... sounds like somebody loves me...!

Dear Lovely Girl,

It is so important to listen to the right voices. Many times, we must tune out almost every voice around us to be able to focus on what is true for our own lives.

Please don't give any heed at all to the useless opinions of others, beautiful friend. Act for yourself. Face your own truths...then act on your own truths.

Turn off the confusing lies, tune them out...plug your ears when there are annoying, loud, negative voices that have no business giving you opinions about your own life.

You know SO much more than you think you know. Your inner compass will guide you. Those feelings in your gut are your deepest wisdom. Be brave and tune out all of the voices, except the voices that are speaking your truth.


You are courageous and amazing....and oh so loved.

xoxo

Basking and soaking in THAT one ...! :)

Shalom & Namaste,
Dena

P.S. Yeah, all y'all can borrow it ... if you're a man, just apply it to your inner-anima (feminine side) ... or squint, or alter the words ...! Don't miss the message!