Sunday, May 3, 2009

It's been a long, hard day.

We're in relationship with some folks, a close friendship, and as things are wont to do amongst we humans, things had gotten tense. Misunderstandings led to hurt, hurt led to self-protection; self-protection led to distance ... and a chasm of separation grew between us. None of us knew how to see the situation for what it is, nor did we know how to breach the divide.

And yet, for reasons none of us could deny ... we were drawn to reconcile. Our minds were hollering for vindication, for justification, for "winning," even while our hearts were saying, "love is stronger than this ... love can make a way, where there seems to be no way."

And so, we gathered together, to hear each other's hearts ... to speak truth in love, to share our unique perspectives, to listen to each other, to "try on for size" another's experience, and to peel back the layers of self-protection, in order to see what's really there in the core of each of us: Unity.

Not some sappy, "put-on-the-vapid-grin-and-sing-Kum-Ba-Yah" sentimentality (even as I confess that I *am* a child of the 60's ... and the 70's ... and the 80's ... heck, I haven't grown up yet!), but a deep resonating reality of Oneness that we share, in spite of the veneer we use in an attempt to keep us "safe" from the invasion of intimacy ... (& please do not attempt to digraph this sentence!).

It feels GOOD to experience that connection with another human being -- particularly after a season of separation (either real or perceived). It feels GOOD to have tension melt away, to stop seeing another human being as an "enemy," and to remember, "oh yeah, I love them. I'd forgotten. My truth was clouded over by pain."

It feels GOOD to connect, heart to heart, soul to soul, face to face, with another human being ... to be heard, to be understood, to be accepted, even to be validated.

Our hearts, I believe, are hungry for this ... and as I look around this world we're living in, I see that most folks are starved for this connection, and are lashing out from their separation-prisons. Love, I believe, can heal the world ... starting right where we are, in the relationships we find ourselves in. Love is the very heart of God ... and our very truest nature.

Every attack is a cry for help.

Every conflict is an invitation to go deep, to discover who we really are, who the other really is.

I'm responding to that invitation ... I can't settle for less.

Shalom, Dena


Benjamin Graber said...

Thank you for being open - it is so exciting to see that real reconciliation really can happen! I've seen it in my own life, too - I've seen a relationship that caused lots of pain for many years turn into a relationship of much encouragement. And I believe by faith that Father can do that in all broken relationships...



Mammal_Mama said...

This is so encouraging to hear! I've felt rather isolated for quite a while. All my former close friends remain in a more religious mindset.

And one close friendship broke up over my friend's disagreement with me for not punishing my kids. She felt they were just getting to know God as Lamb, not Lion -- and how would they cope when they learned about the "God Who inflicts pain?".

Patrick said...

There must be something to validation and validating people in spite of their view point. I wonder how Jesus validated those that came against Him? Forgive them as they know not what they do(done or will continue doing) must be one of the strongest forms of validation. How can one validate unless they hear... Perhaps you have finally been heard, not fully, but enough to move forward.

Dena said...

I'm hearing such brilliance (coming from Light) in you folks! Yes, you're each exhibiting the heart of God ... our God who prayed, through Jesus, that we would be One. Not in mere concept, but in experiential reality. The sense of separation causes pain, and so does the awakening to how we've been duped by the delusion of separation. Growing pains seem inevitable to me ... things can be painful, even as we recognize that they're very, very good. May my perspective be ever-more His ... may I see with His eyes, may I love with His heart, may I demonstrate with that love, all that I think, say, and do. And may I accept (even embrace!) all that happens as I'm transformed into the Mind of Christ. Methinks I'll have to have reminders along the way, when the "not-so-fun-stuff" shows up...! ;)

EddDee said...

Your comments about the value of pain are so true. They remind me of something I once heard. I'm not a Bhuddist, but I like to think I can resonate to truth, wherever it comes from. I believe the Bhudda said that all of existence is like a river flowing back to perfection, to oneness, in God, and that all pain and suffering is the result of resisting that flow, of trying to hold on to things--keeping them as they are, (or worse, as they were).

Thanks again for opening up for us.

Dena said...

EddDee - thou speakest wisdom!

I feel like a kid in a candy-store, discovering all of God's truth, "hidden" all over creation, in all the places He's "not supposed" to show up, LOL! No one's got a monopoly on Him, nor upon His truth. No religion can contain Him, not even Christianity.

I'm discovering what you're discovering -- what I resist, persists. What I embrace, is absorbed in the Light of Love.

Shalom, Dena