Friday, September 11, 2009

The Nature of God ...

What do you envision when you think of "God"...?

What's the first impression that comes to mind...?

Is it something you want to run to and embrace, or something that causes you to hold back?

My previous view of God's nature was skewed at best, and schizophrenic at worst ... it seemed as if God's attitude toward me was dependent upon my current disposition ... my actions, thoughts, achievements. If I were "good" then God was remotely pleased (though, not praising me, as this was *expected* of me). If I were "bad" then God was at least disappointed, if not outright pissed (another word for "wrathful"). God always seemed to be in potential mid-smite mode ... you know, his hand ready with that lightning bolt, just waiting for me to mess up, so that He could send a "lesson" my way, for my own good, of course.

Seriously, this thought was the background music of my life ... the perpetual thought that God was ready to send something bad to me ... for my own good. As a result, it was nearly impossible for me to trust God ... this version of God. I felt I couldn't turn to Him unless I had no choice (when things were dire) ... instead I felt the need to figure things out for myself ... to do the best I can (and yet always aware that my best was woefully inadequate). Talk about a catch-22!

When I prayed, I felt like I had to be meticulously detailed in what I wanted God to do ... that I had to convince Him to do good toward me, that I had to dictate to Him, otherwise, I might get one of those "for your own good" answers...!

And perhaps I should sweeten the deal, and really impress God with my holiness ... perhaps longer prayers, more Bible-reading, more church-attendance, lots of do-gooding, and if I really wanted to get God's attention -- to fast from food, or abstain from a favorite activity...!

Yeah, that'll stack things in my favor!

But, a funny thing happened in the mist of my careful construction of the nature of God ... God dismantled it.

Oh, not all at once ... but there came the day when I turned to God because my foundations were shaking ... only to discover that it was *God* who was shaking them...!

Yikes! Now what?!?

I've learned much about God along the way ... most of which cannot be passed on, second-hand, but must be learned and experienced, rather than "proven."

Still, in sharing some of these things, it helps me to see what I've come to know, and perhaps may affirm that which is in your own heart, that which He is speaking in YOU (& that, I believe, is the essence of the Word of God -- His Voice within).

I've come to see that God is unchangeable ... He is good, and that goodness is consistent, unwavering, immutable. God is not reactive, dependent upon me, His creation, to determine how He will treat me. He is love -- everything about Him comes out of that love -- no exceptions. He is Light, and in Him is NO darkness at all. I cannot earn His love, I cannot deserve His goodness ... His love and goodness are His very nature. He is constant, all the time. Toward me, toward you, toward all.

Now, religion has indeed told us that God changes ... but religion is of man -- truth is of God. We can have our minds renewed ... we can move from religion to relationship.

Nothing that any of us does, or fails to do, will EVER change God, God's nature, or God's perception. I can, and do, suffer from my own false beliefs (lies in my mind), but when I turn to the very Spirit of Truth, to renew my mind, to show me a higher way of thinking, I find that God is unchangeable goodness -- each and every time.

Try it.

I have discovered that the God of reward and punishment is a fabrication of our own confused minds, a fruit of our shame-based and fear-based thinking ... and not the Truth about God...!

We are one with the God of goodness. We can, and must, move from our current erroneous thinking about God, into the Mind of Christ -- Jesus manifested God Himself, and told us, if we've seen Him, we've seen the Father.

May the Mind of Christ enlighten the dark places in our egoic/carnal minds ... may the Light of God absorb all shadows, all darkness, transforming and renewing our minds into His.

Shalom, Dena

1 comment:

MysticBrit said...

Well, Dena, I used to have second- and third-hand opinions about God. Now God is All That Is, and I see that He and I have never been separate, and that He's allways been inviting me to dance with HIm.

I'm learning the unforced rhythms of grace...