Exposing the Ego ~ Anger/Forgiveness

Have you noticed how the ego thinks it's pretty smart...? Well, rest-assured that the Spirit is infinitely smarter ... in fact, it's so smart that it USES the ego's tactics to work on exposing and dismantling (& ultimately absorbing, as in embraced-to-death!) the ego.

Y'know, hug the snot out of it 'til it's utterly enfolded in Love ...!

Such could be our response to our "enemies", once we saw them as they are, once we saw their attacks as a cry for love ... (more on that next time).

It seems crucial to me to keep in mind that I draw people into my circle in order for them to mirror my blind spots to me. I "project" my own imagined guilt onto the "screens" of their behavior so that I can see my own stuff, and thus be healed. So simple. So elusive...!

When I see my guilt in you (the guilt I cannot bear to confront in myself), I have the blessed opportunity of letting it go. And that's the bare essence of forgiveness ... "undoing the projection of guilt." Don't let the ego convince you that you're exempt from this, or try to distract you by saying, "but that guy's stuff isn't your stuff ... you don't do that precise thing!" It's the content of the sin that matters -- NOT the form. Don't get sidetracked from the healing you can receive -- the healing you need.

When I forgive you for the sin you "commit against" me ... I'm really forgiving myself for having the sin I projected onto you. And when I can see you through the lens of the Spirit, then I'm able to see myself through that same Spirit-lens. I can then, finally, see that you and I share the same Light -- the Light of God.

What this tells me is that I can only be grateful for each and every person who comes into my life (whom I drew into my life), *especially* those with whom I experience the most struggle, challenge, and pain...! These gift-persons are the very ones sent/drawn to me to enable me to heal from that which is most harming me from *within* ... that which I am terrified to look at, which is eating me alive, and which is causing me the most devastation. These folks are gifts-in-disguise. I must see past the disguise, into the GIFT that they bring -- the gift that they ARE.

Of course, when I'm in ego-mode (our typical MO), that's the LAST thing I WANT to do! What I want to do is to see my problem as *that guy*, and what he *did to me*, and see myself as a poor victim ... and I will gather others to my "side", to support my ego-version of my story, and further justify my martyrdom, my anger, my judgment, my hatred, for that one who dared to harm me. But ... how's that working for me so far? What's the fruit of that position, of telling myself that story? Of believing my own egoic propaganda...?

Would I rather be "right" or happy...?

Forgiveness is crucial ... it may not be an overstatement to say that it's one of THE points of this life. Certainly we can see the destructive and cataclysmic results of a *lack* of forgiveness all around us ... divorce rates ... church splits ... marital squabbles ... gang rivalries ... racial clashes ... gender battles ... family grudges ... tribal breaches ... international wars ...

And also, disease within our own bodies ... numerous studies indicate a connection between unforgiveness and auto-immune disorders and cancers ...

What would this world look like -- what would we feel like, and how would we live -- if we made forgiveness a true & practiced reality in our lives...?

And what if, with the practice of deep, true forgiveness ... we came to realize that there's nothing to forgive...?

Perhaps we could look more deeply into forgiveness ... for surely the "forgiveness" we've been taught isn't working too well ...

It's been surmised by some that forgiveness can be summarized in three basic steps.

Step One: I recognize that the problem is not "out there" in the other person (i.e., the "screen"). I recognize that the problem is in me, and I am projecting it onto someone else. So ... in this realization, I see that my anger towards another is not justified. The problem is not outside of me but inside of me (this is important to realize, because God has put the Answer, the Spirit, within me ... and if I keep the problem "out there" then the problem is kept separate from the Answer). The ego, who is utterly invested in me NOT solving this problem, will insist, over and over, that the problem is outside of me (in you, my parents, a teacher, a boss, a friend, a spouse, a child, the President, the economy, another religion, another nation, another race, a disease, or even God). In truth, there is only one problem: my belief that I am separate from God. From this stems my fear, guilt, sin, anger, and conflict with all others.

Step Two: (The hardest part of all!) I recognize that I have to face and deal with my own stuff (my guilt). My fear of facing it will strongly tempt me to see it as belonging in you (or another). But if I face my fear, and look at the guilt, and question the guilt ("Is it true?"), I will come to see that I made a decision to see myself as guilty. And I can make another decision -- to see myself as a guiltless Son of God, rather than a guilty son of the ego. Like the prodigal in the pig sty (of his own making), I can look around and say, "this is not who I Really Am ... I can return Home to Who I Really Am. I am not what I think I am -- and you are not what I've made you in my mind ... we are really what God has created." We can go Home, to God, and hear Him say, "Child, you are always with Me -- all that I have is yours."

Have you noticed that like begets like..? An oak tree begets more oak trees ... a dog begets more dogs ... a salmon begets more salmon -- we see this in the world all around us, teaching us this lesson. What does God beget...? Sons of God.

This is what we see when we dare to face our other-projected guilt, and really look at it, and see it as God sees it (rather than as the ego declares it to be). It's painful ... it's fearful. It's necessary. It's what Jesus spoke of when He said, "take up your cross and follow Me...". It's what Paul the apostle wrote when he said, "work out your salvation [which means wholeness] with fear and trembling." We are so invested in the ego's perspective, and it is so very entrenched in this whole world, that there is no way for anyone to go through this process without severe difficulty and pain. And the final obstacle to peace, is our belief that we are to be fearful of God ...! When that one is questioned and dismantled, the rest falls into place.

Step Three: I choose to invite the Holy Spirit to renew my mind ... correcting the wrong-thought system that I've erected and protected in my own mind. I cannot do this on my own -- it's too huge. I invite and allow the Spirit to transform my perspective from a "child of guilt" to a "child of Love." The former is birthed by the ego (& is an illusion) ... the latter is birthed by God (& is real). We don't do this step, the Spirit does ... and in reality, we realize that it's ALREADY DONE. God never saw us as guilty ... WE did. Our acceptance of this is the only problem.

So, to simplify the process: 1. I see the anger as in me, not outside of me. 2. I realize that I made up the problem in the first place. 3. I decide I no longer want this problem, and I give it to the Spirit... and He takes it from me.

Sounds simple. But it takes a lifetime, or beyond, to live it out. Having our minds renewed IS a way of life ... the best way of life ... the reason why we're here. The experiences and situations that make up our life are the tools sent to us to assist us in awakening to Who We Really Are, in Christ, in God.

The real and practical goal is not to *rid* ourselves of all problems, but to recognize the problems as the gifts they really are, and to use them as a means to our healing. The process is slow, and requires patience ... and those who say they have arrived, are only speaking out of their egos ... LOL!

Next, I want to go through a specific example of how this works out, in the context of "real life experience".

For Halloween, how appropriate to take off the ego's mask a bit...!

Shalom, Dena